My wonderful parents Heather & Kevin. This was them on a date. How stylish were they? (I have learnt to scan photos so now I'll be able to have some regular pics of things in here...soooo excited about that. I had to do some for the High School Reunion & it turned into a midnight scanning frenzy!!)I have some great photos of mum & dad now ON THE COMPUTER. How I miss them. My SIL acknowledged the other day how hard it must be having kids without parents there...it made me teary that she 'understood' now that she has a daughter of her own. I love D's mum but I think as I grow older, towards my 40's & the age when Mum had me I really really miss them more, her especially. I think giving birth to children & not be able to tell your parents how much you appreciate all they did for you - because some things click into place when you have a child of your own - is so hard. (I realised how SELFISH I was, I realised how little I knew,I realised what an incredible journey having a child was & I wanted to ask more questions about my 'history' & me.) Dad died suddenly when I was 24, & Mum died in her sleep when I was 27. I'm so glad they were there to see me Graduate from Uni & Dad was able to walk me down the aisle, but there are so many little moments that I don't get to share. I don't want to sound like I'm whining...I am grateful I had them for so long. I hope David & I can be there for Bonnie & Eric for many years yet...because I know how sad it can be to go on your life journey & not get to share things with the people who raised you & love you unconditionally...
David & I were talking about backdating/starting another Blog with all the Leukaemia information & photos etc...that would be a mammoth job though. David thought that after his counselling session yesterday he would look on the internet for people that were also dealing with life after a BMT...he found Baldy's Blog (Adrian Sudbury) which we started looking at + the uTube video Blogs. Then we found this...
I was a bit of a teary mess after seeing some of that hospital footage - it brought back many memories of last year. But I was able to talk to D before we went to sleep last night about some hopes & even fears. I love that man...so desperately. Some people are so strong, so determined, so focused, endlessly positive & I reel off balance in the face of their strength sometimes. We live each day as well as we can, not knowing what is ahead, but trusting in Something & Someone bigger than ourselves...yet it's hard...it's so hard reading that cancer has claimed yet another life. Another one of our Quest for Life friends has died...you think I would not be shocked any more, but the reminder of the preciousness if life always makes me want to double my efforts to live well...