Bus Crash

Today wasn't quite the day I was expecting...it started with news that one of the school buses was involved in a crash which was more traumatic than I first realised. 

Felt very emotional & teary by the end of the day, but so grateful to God that no children were more seriously injured...it is pretty miraculous that they came out with mainly scrapes & bruises...

Today I saw our school at it's best: staff who had a day off arriving to try to help out, parents bringing in coffee, children comforting younger kids, people pulling together & planning how best to help the school community. 

Monday morning I will be sleeping in, but praying from here with Eric, as the morning briefing will involve trauma counsellors briefing the staff who will then try to help kids who might need to share what they've been through...

I'm relieved that I won't be working so hard next week but I really feel for those kids involved & the families of those killed. Kids from our school were OK, but what about that couple who died - did they have children, were they happy that morning, do their friends & families know they they were killed, what happened as the car started drifting across the road. 

As I sat in the staff room listening to the trauma counsellor speak to the staff my eyes welled up with tears thinking - this is what happened in 2007, only at that time the focus was on Leukaemia & how the kids would feel to hear that the Principal had cancer. Today it was another tragedy & reminder of this fallen world we all live in with all it's pain & suffering...

Bed time, cuppa time, rest time...

Glad it's the weekend...

Post Reunion

 Well, I feel like I am still recovering after the reunion. I didn't get home until the wee hours of the morning - that in itself is very very rare for me unless someone here is sick - & I have to say it was wonderful to see all those faces 20 years down the track...yet it is surreal to summarise "life" in a few short minutes. A friend was worried about me & asked how I would go talking about David & his illness so many times, but I actually just chose not to go through it with some people...what was more distressing was discussing CHILDREN. An old friend works in a NICU for newborn babies & spoke about how to watch families lose their babies has been so hard for her over the years & how she struggles in this line of work...And it was one of those events where people mingle & wander in & out of others conversations...I started to try to mention some of what I had been through with children, & after a few attempts I decided that it was just too hard to start being too detailed about anything. I was brief! Someone from our year died of cancer, others had not married or had children & I am guessing that many have probably lost children - statistically. In spite of this - & the fact that I have lost my confidence in big social gatherings despite having spoken to many many people over the years & run big music events - I did have a wonderful time, but found some discussions very very hard. There is something amazing about seeing everyone so "grown up" & more sure of themselves - moving into our 40s. Wow!! It was hillarious seeing the old photos of everyone in their 80s gear. Glad I scanned lots of pics as my contribution. 

I feel a loss for the friendships that have disappeared over the years. I was so sad that two old friends in particular were either hard to find or didn't respond to any emails/correspondence...perhaps I'm a little hurt about the loss of that season of friendship? Sigh...yet friendship is a two way street I know. I have been just as hopeless with keeping in touch with people over the years.  Anyway, all those who were there enjoyed themselves I think!! 

David is very stressed at the moment. We ponder our future. It's hard when there are bills to pay etc. It's hard to make big decisions without hindsight. I spin between positivity to anxiety...perhaps I need to go & take up a job somewhere to ease the financial stress?? Perhaps more money isn't the solution but a seachange somewhere? I just feel like I have put down my roots here & all this change & heartache is so very hard...I can only do a day at a time though....