Bonnie was performing in the afternoon assembly (as a lion) & I was just shoving in a banana sandwich & grabbing my keys when the phone rang.
I answered. It was D.
"Elissa, Bonnie fell over at school. She'll be in sick bay. She doesn't want to dress up for assembly..."
Rolling my eyes. (Talk about unsympathetic I know!) After sooooo many falls at school she insists on running on concrete. Last time she grazed down one side of her face & she has so many bruises & cuts. I just throw tea tree oil in the bath so much as an antiseptic. I just thought...typical, my daughter inherited my clumsy genes.
I drove up to school - no rush because I didn't need to get to the assembly on time now. Praying as I drove. (She often falls to pieces when I arrive after a tumble. There's something about mum & comfort. Dad is Mr Funbags, but Mum is the one who cleans up the blood & poo & vomit etc etc...)
I get there & she is screaming in the toilet. D is standing outside, holding her costume looking distressed.
I enter the toilets.
"Mum, I can't wee."
"What do you mean you can't wee. Sit on that toilet & try to wee."
She sits there & starts screaming the most ear piercing scream I've ever heard. Hysterical fear & pain.
'Mother bear' just takes over. Right. Hospital. Grab son from the assembly. Drive husband & son home. Drive to hospital as quickly as possible in wet. Comfort sobbing daughter in back of car telling me how she is "busting to wee". What the hell has she done? Fractured her pelvis? Ripped something? Twisted something internally?
Thank God - only ONE person ahead of us. Bon paces up & down the room.
"Mum, I can't wait any longer."
See triage nurse. Bon tries to explain what happened.
Hop on bed.
Nurse tries to examine "that" area. Blood on undies...can't see anything because Bon has totally flipped out & is screaming HYSTERICALLY. Nurse rushes to get Dr. Meanwhile Bon EXPLODES with wee, I am standing there with not even a scrap of tissue to collect it. Bed wet. Hunting for SOMETHING to mop it up. This is a damn hospital, isn't there a pad or something I can use? A blanket even???
Dr comes running.
Tries to be polite.
(In my head: Just hold her down & look. Stick a catheter up her. Give her pain relief. DO SOMETHING!!!!!!!)
Next thing she is in a wheelchair, taken to a kids bed in emergency, crying, scared...they put something on her finger to measure her heart rate, they check her blood pressure & said they needed to do a decent investigation...perhaps under general anesthetic if she'd done major damage, or perhaps put numbing cream on the area so they could see...
I have a bad track record with parking in the wrong spot at hospitals & not seeing the signs, so I had to go & move the car from my "30 minutes only" spot before getting booked. I actually found a spot where I didn't have to pay money & there were no signs telling me I couldn't park there...phew.
I came back to a Bonnie who had told them she would not be examined under any circumstances unless Mummy was there. They said that they had phoned the Sydney Childrens' Hospital & were waiting for advice. Phone D. SMS people & ask them to pray. I think we played iSpy with just about every single thing in the area we could see. We diagnosed all the kids that we could hear & see around us. I helped give her some pain relief & then she went all silly. Perhaps that was strong stuff? But at least she calmed down. Until she needed to wee again...
I took her to the bathroom & she danced & hopped around for 10 minutes.
"I want to but I can't. It's going to hurt..." Meanwhile I'm trying to mop up some old guys wee who peed on the floor...
More hysterical screaming.
We worked out that as she'd fallen at school she must have slightly grazed that whole area so the acidic urine was stinging & her fear of the pain was helping her keep those amazing pelvic muscles closed. I guess it's like after having a baby - that area can be sore when it's tender (not the good pelvic muscles bit)...I had to keep that Mrs Calm-oh-I-am-so-CALM-even-though-you-are-screaming-the-hospital-emergency-area-down voice!
"Yes Bon, I can hear what you are saying. It certainly hurts. But if you don't wee there's going to be more problems."
And (LMAO) as we headed toward the toilet the male nurse said "Can you see if you can get a sample - mid stream?"
We got I think, Oh, about 3 drops before my freaked out daughter had had enough of the whole process.
By this time it's about 4:30 or so? No afternoon tea as we're not sure whether we are heading to theatre...
"I need to wee mum"
Dr: "How about trying to wee in a small tub of warm water?"
Poor male nurse hunts all around for the biggest thing he can find for her to sit in & said he'd leave it to me to help her. Curtains close. Bon takes one look at small metal basin & give me one of those WTH looks. "I can't even climb onto THAT! I have a sore hand."
OK, (observing her dancing around) we can try the toilets again. Grab sample bottle.
Arrive back at toilet.
THANK YOU GOD, someone has cleaned up the whole area with disinfectant!
More dancing, more crying, more stress.
Be patient Elissa, don't strangle daughter in hospital toilet!
"Mum I think I could try to do that wee."
We even got MID STREAM.
Bon worked out a way to sit, a way to hold paper on sore graze that didn't hurt quite so mindblowingly.
Proudly strut back to bed (wrapped in huge hospital gown as sports uniform was weed all over during previous explosive wee) & wave sample at male nurse.
Dr comes in again. "No word from kids hospital, but can I get you a coffee?"
I'm sorry, did I hear you correctly????????
Caffine withdrawal improved, & nurse found me sandwiches - fresh & made that day even! What is happening to the hospital system?
Ah yes. Back to waiting waiting waiting.
This is the way I remember things with D & his cancer treatment. HOURS of waiting.
Triage nurse comes in. "Are you STILL here?"
Dr comes in to examine Bon. She was VERY brave & let her check. Held my hand & grimaced in my face. Poor little sweetheart.
"Well, I can't see anything."
Then at about 9pm when I thought I'd be heading home to bring her some PJs Dr returned with an ultrasound machine. Ugg. Although I had some bad memories of ultrasounds I was relieved to see something happening.
OK, that sac is the bladder with wee in it. (I'm amazed considering she had been a few times & hadn't been allowed to drink all afternoon.)
"Emergency at the kids hospital said that if you go & wee & can empty it all the way then you can probably go home."
Tears. I don't think I can do a wee. I don't want to wee.
MAN OH MAN, IF YOU WEE WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE. WEEEEEEEEEE
She managed to wee - THANK YOU UMPIRE, THANK YOU BALL BOYS, THIS GAME IS OVER!!!!!!!!!!
Dr: you can probably eat now. So Bon had afternoon tea + some stuff the nurse brought + asked to stop at Maccas on the way home!!!!!
The Dr then said "You've been complaining about that hand, why don't we have a look at it." Pain, sore...rather than wait another 4 hours for xray she suggested a little bone near the thumb probably was broken & she'd put a preventative cast on it (must keep dry - are you for real lady?) & let us go. So at least it LOOKS impressive, even though the thumb was the least of her problems!
I got the car & she was lead out wearing her gown & a blanket. An ex-student I taught gave her an encouragement award as we left.
We got home to a drugged out D who had been fielding calls all night from people who heard. He was in distress. His daughter was in hospital. It's different being the carer rather than the patient. Good for him to see perhaps? We ate our Maccas. The kitchen was a disaster zone, Eric was bathed & in bed though & had eaten...something.
It was about 11pm when I fell into bed.
SO that is my debrief.
Grateful that it wasn't more serious. Grateful that she was able to do that final wee because if she hadn't passed that test I would have been driving to Randwick (in the city) at 11pm for xrays & MORE waiting...
These are the times when you realise what you signed up for as a mother...yet I wouldn't exchange it for anything. To be the parent of an amazing little being really is...not always what you expect, but always interesting & NEVER DULL!!!!!!!